And then the magical travelling romani circus of scholastic would randomly show up and you’d never care to buy any books but they had AWESOME gadgets and toys for sale
at the motherfucking BOOK FAIR
but I’m tired of pretending. Idk if it’s Saint Mary’s that’s much more difficult or the fact that I switched from nursing to pre-med (physician’s assistant, not an MD). My time is constantly spent doing homework or studying for some sort of test that I have that week. I have no room during the week to do anything else. I barely have time to eat and shower. I used to not do any homework on the weekends (besides Sunday night) to give myself a break and keep myself sane but lately, I just can’t afford that. I gave up dance, something that’s been my life for the past 5 years so I can keep up with school. I’ve been trying to go to workshops when I can but nowadays I just don’t feel like it because I’m so stressed with school. My mind is always somewhere else. It makes me kinda sad because it’s something I used to love and enjoy doing but I’m so distracted with other things that it’s hard to enjoy now. I don’t really see any of my friends anymore because I’m too tired to go out on weekends. I really just want to sleep early on Friday and Saturday nights because those are the only 2 nights that I can really get any sleep. Did I mention I stayed up till 5am last Thursday studying for a social psych midterm? I almost had a breakdown last week after finding out I’m barely passing Chemistry II and Social Psychology, even after all the effort I was putting in. I’m extra stressed about Chem II because I need it as a prerequisite for 2 of my classes next semester. Without it, I’m moved another semester behind. Sorry but I cannot extend my 6 year college plan even longer. I’m a B average student and have never failed a class before. Right now I just feel like I gave up everything to get nothing. I feel like I’m letting my youth just pass me by. When I was at SJSU, I was still a hard working student, but I never felt like I wasn’t enjoying my life. I still hung out with friends, I was able to dance on the side, and I was able to spend time with my boyfriend. Yes, I am pre-med and that’s what happens when I get into a major like that but I just feel like I’m not living, even just a little bit. I haven’t made a lot of friends at SMC so I pretty much do hw and sleep after class and the same thing repeats the next day. Even with the friends that I do have at school, I’m not able to chill with them because of all the homework I have to get done. I don’t mean to complain about my life because I understand that I’m lucky for having such a blessed life, to even have an education. And yes, we are all college students and all that studying is just a normal part of the college experience. I just feel like I’m not living my life to it’s full potential, especially at this age because some years from now, I won’t be able to do certain things like I would at this age. I don’t want to regret anything but it’s hard to balance that with the pressure of my major. Or the pressure of this school. Idk which one it is, probably a combination of the two. All I know is that I just don’t want to be one of those people that are so committed to work that they don’t know how to live anymore.
Amen. Someone needs to get rid of Lil Mama too.
If Mos Wanted or Fanny Pak wasn’t on ABDC I would of never started watching it again. I haven’t watched a full season of ADBC since Jabba. I hope its them 2 in the end and Mos Wanted wins to be honest. No tricks and shit. All talent.